My husband deserves an award for not losing his temper with me, my friends are all up for sainthood with their unending support and kindness, and the whole universe deserves a big thank you for putting up with me.
I realize how lucky I am. I have a wonderful family and amazing friends. I have a home, a car, a dog, and a life 99% of the rest of the world can only dream of.
And still, I’m in a funk.
I’m sure a lot of it is job related. There’s nothing quite so demoralizing as getting up every morning dreading the rest of the day. Puts me in a bad mood right off the bat and keeps me there all day.
Some of it is seasonal. I hate that the days are getting shorter and the temperature colder. I hate that leaving my house now requires planning. I have to leave time for defrosting and scraping the car, time for slick roads, and time for searching for my other mitten. I hate that I will only see the sun out my office window: it doesn’t rise until I’m at my desk and it sets before I leave for the day.
Some of it is just outright bitchiness.
Some of it is dissatisfaction with myself. I had some very definite goals for myself and I have not met them and am mad at myself for failing.
I just want to slink back to bed, pull the covers over my head, have a good cry, and stay there forever.