Dear Husband:

I just got home from work.

Hi.

I know you’ve been storing up questions and discussion topics and bits of information to give me ALL DAY LONG and you just need to get them out NOW NOW NOW and you’re talking and chattering and asking questions and expecting me to respond and make decisions and, seriously, I can’t do this.

I don’t know what we should do about our health benefit re-enrollment, I don’t want to discuss selling one of the motorcycles, I don’t care what we eat for dinner tomorrow, I know the dog needs his nails cut, and no, buy your own damned deodorant.

I am tired.  All day long there are people talking at me, demanding my time, my attention, my ability to be a walking thesaurus and there’s noise and words and ringing phones and emails and conversations and this constant bombardment from which there’s no escape, not even in the bathroom and I just want five minutes where no one wants anything from me.

No questions. No mail to read. No discussions. No demands. No talking.  No shopping lists to write. No noise. No paperwork to review, no messages to listen to, no phone calls to make.

Nothing.

Five minutes of peace.

Please.

Then I’ll do whatever it is you need.