Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Disappointment

I’ve been unemployed for 4 months now.

At first, it was fun. I was happy to be out of my former place of employment, with its dysfunction and stress. I was happy to sleep at night for the first time in several months. I was happy to start my new adventure, to find a job I would love, to have a little bit of down time while I looked for employment.

Now, though, it’s just sad. I’m trying to be accepting of my position, but really, it fucking sucks.

I’m not cut out to stay at home all day. I hate housework and dishes and mowing the lawn twice a week. I miss feeling useful, putting my mind to work every day, doing SOMETHING with my time.

I miss earning a paycheck.

I’ve papered the upper Midwest in resumes. I’ve sent resumes for jobs in Brussels and Colorado (the mister is fine with relocating if I can find a decent job). I’ve emailed and called and sent letters to complete strangers with whom I have even the most tenuous of connections (we went to the same undergrad, 3 decades apart, hire me!).

Nothing.

The occasional lunch, offers to meet and discuss the market, some volunteer work that I’ve enjoyed, but nothing on the job front.

I want a job.

Today I set a new record for rejections letters/emails received in one day: 5.

Despite dealing with the disappointment of rejection rather frequently over the last few months, this stung. Not even an interview. Seriously, what is wrong with me that I can’t find a job?

4 comments:

Pickles and Dimes said...

Absolutely NOTHING is wrong with you. NOTHING. The job market just completely and utterly sucks right now.

My husband is in the same boat (unemployed for 4 months, bored to tears with being at home, etc.). He's had a few phone interviews, one face-to-face interview and that's it. In June, we found two decent jobs to apply for - two.

Unfortunately, employers are now able to demand the world and pay crap, and they'll still receive 200+ applications.

Hang in there. I'm sending "dream job" vibes your way.

P.S. I'm sure you know about this site already, but just in case, indeed.com is one of the better job hunting sites out there.

rmsdeese said...

I'm in the same boat, you're not alone!

MOLLY said...

It will get better - I promise.

Sophia said...

Keep your chin up dear, i've been in this boat for 4 years now! We lived in foreign countries for 3 years and because I kept renewing my papers on a yearly basis; employers were unwilling to give me a try (probably thought I was too risky or something).
So I went back to school for post-grad studies, gained a masters then came back home (UK) to the "credit crunch" so no jobs, no money and more mooching off my husband!
In September, I'm starting my PhD (hey it pays and I'm getting further qualified).

I have had to put off starting my family, buying loads of pretty things, I am more of a domestic goddess than I'd like to admit and a helluva lot more frugal too but it does mean I'll be better qualified and have a lot more to offer at the other side of the credit crunch.
I suppose it's just my way of making lemonade out of lemons (and a bit of a dream come true as I always wanted to be a PhD).

Take the time for yourself, pick up new hobbies, tick some things on your life's to do list and remember this too will pass.